Posted by: addictionstinks | April 10, 2011

4 Months And Counting

Wow! The time is really going by fast! In just 4 months J will be out of prison. I look at the last time I blogged and it was March 24 – 17 days ago – and I cannot believe its been that long. They say “Life is like a roll of toilet paper, it goes faster as you get nearer the end.” No kidding!

Anyways, we’ve been very busy making our plans for when J is out. He has plans to go to college and study automotive mechanics. And play football. And date LOTS of different girls (his words). At this point, his plan is to stay broken up with Patsy. He’s been kind of waffling back and forth between trying to get her back or not. But I think he’s finally beginning to understand why he shouldn’t. I keep telling him, its not HER I worry so much about, but its her whole circle of friends/family. Her best friend was just arrested (again) and then I get a text from Patsy trying to mooch the money to bail her out. Uhhhhhhhhh, NO!!! She was arrested for “Unlawful use of a weapon, Posession of cannabis, Posession of drug paraphernalia, and Illegal transportation of alcohol.” Seriously???? This is getting way too ugly now with the weapons charge! She is now in county jail, hopefully for a very long time.

So then J realized that Patsy NEVER tried to come up with the money to bail him out when he got arrested. But she’s been busting her butt trying to get the money to bail out her best friend now. Hmmmmmmmmm! This kinda ticked him off!! Good!!!!!! I really don’t want them back together. But I do keep telling him that I can’t control him or make that decision for him. Its ultimately HIS choice.

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Responses

  1. J’s goals and objectives sound very hopeful as he is planning his release. I will be keeping J and you in my prayers that he believes in himself and executes on all of the positives!

  2. I have to be very careful how I say this because I don’t want to sound like I am blaming the girlfriend (in this case Keven’s, not Patsy). BUT I believe that IF my son would have not gotten back together with his emotionally and mentally unhealthy girlfriend when he got home from his first 6 months in jail/rehab, he would have made much more progress. I am not blaming the gf, it was keven’s choice. But the drama their relationship caused in his life is what kept him in such a horrible frame of mind for a YEAR until they finally broke up for good (when Kev went back into custody and the gf hooked up with one of his best buddies).

    All this to say – I know you can’t control J’s decision over Patsy but if you can help him to see that she spells TROUBLE for him, hopefully he will stay away from her. Seriously – he needs all the positives in his life when he gets home that he can surround himself with (and it sounds like he has some excellent plans!). Throwing her back into the picture is like setting himself up for failure – in my opinion. I normally don’t share such strong opinions, but this is my gut talking here.

    As a mom, I wanted Kev to be happy and saw there were many benefits to having a gf but this last year without one has proved to him that being involved with her was destructive.

    J is a great guy that will be able to meet some new girls and I like the idea of dating LOTS of different ones. That will help him determine what kind of woman he wants in his life rather than taking the easy route of getting back with the one he’s comfortable with.

    I’ll write him if you want me too! LOL. Seriously, relationships can make or break recovery. Some help some hurt and Patsy does not seem like the type that will help. No offense to her, I know you care about her.


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