Posted by: addictionstinks | September 2, 2010

Question – WWYD?

J called today from prison. Apparently they did a shakedown in his cell last night, and took his hot pot away from him. They said that a screw was taken out of the bottom of the hot pot. This could be big trouble for J. If they determine that he removed the screw, he could end up in segregation and/or end up on C-grade for the next 2 months. This would mean that he is unable to apply for the work-release program until he is released from C-grade.

He swears he did nothing to his hot pot.

He is asking me to call the warden and tell him that he did nothing to his hot pot. His reasoning is that they listen to people from the outside, way more than they listen to the prisoners.

I’m torn. On the one hand, I believe that he did nothing to his hot pot. J has ALWAYS been really good at telling on himself. If he did remove the screw, he would tell me he removed the screw, and it sucks, but he’s gonna get in trouble for it. Since he is very determined that he did NOT do it, I believe him.

So, do I call the warden and try to convince him that my son should not get in trouble for this, as he did nothing? Or should I leave it lie, cuz after all, prison is supposed to suck? Part of me wants to help my son. The other part of me wants to let him take the consequences, even tho he did nothing wrong, just to show him that prison sucks, so he’ll NEVER want to go back there again.

What would you do???



  1. I would ask whether this is my business (Does it have my name on it?). If it isn’t my business but someone else’s, then I leave it alone.


  3. Frankly I don’t believe the warden will care at all if you call (this is not like in the movies, where everyone and everything fits together so perfectly).

    I agree with Syd. And to be perfectly honest, you have no idea whether J removed the screw from the hot pot or not. You would simply be providing the warden second-hand information with no proof.

    Say a prayer for him and let him handle it.

  4. I’m inclined to agree with Syd and Lisa. It’s a tough situation.

    Praying for you both,

  5. I agree with the above also. The warden doesn’t care what you or anyone else from the outside thinks and like Syd said, if it doesn’t have your name on it, leave it alone. You can not protect him or help him by calling the warden, or doing much else when it comes down to it. (HUGS)

  6. I understand exactly how you feel, I’d be going through the same things in my mind. BUT, I agree with all the comments above.

  7. I’m a little late…but totally agree with everyone else. Hope you had a good weekend!

  8. Hmm…I am no expert but I would say that is enabling in a big way. He is a big boy, he needs to speak to the warden. Can You imagine? How this would go:

    Warden’s Secretary:
    “Warden Mrs. J’s mom is on the phone. She wants to talk to you about the screw in the hot pot. She says he didn’t do it.”

    Sorry I am chuckling …

    One thing I can say for sure , J will recover from the hot pot situation.

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