Posted by: addictionstinks | April 17, 2010

Checked Out and Left

So apparently after J got booted from the rehab facility, he decided to NOT wait around to see what would happen next – he left.

Some other guy there got booted too, along with him, and they left together. He called me and informed me of this – after blocking the number he was calling from. He wouldn’t tell me where he was.

Meanwhile, probation called my cell phone looking for him (not sure how they got MY cell phone number). This was before J called me. I told his probation officer that to my understanding he was leaving with the TASC guy, and I had no idea where he was or what was going on – all true at the time. So when he called I informed him that probation called, and gave him his probation officer’s phone number, and suggested he may want to call her right away. His response, “I’ll call on Monday.” Whatever……

So at this point, he’s with this other addict who got kicked out too, I have no idea where. He claims he’s NOT going to get high (yeah right).




  1. I just read your last post about J being kicked out and then this one. Some of our children are more stubborn than others. He will learn eventually and you are doing the right thing. I hope you can find some peace from the worry. I just said a prayer for you and he!

  2. I would like to say that if you can focus on yourself this weekend and remind yourself that J has a Higher Power too. I know that this must be very hard, but since there is nothing else to be done, it is a start to just take care of you.

  3. I share this alot in meetings for the newcomer with a child in trouble. In all the open speaker meetings that I have attended, I have never heard one person credit their parents for their sobriety. What this means to me is that if I let go and tend to myself, pray, and work my program, my son’s Creator will take care of him and send him people to guide him. It is hard but my son is still using and I love him freely now. It took me time, patience and prayer. ::hugs::

  4. Hang in there! J can block his number from you, and he can hide from his probation officer, but he cannot hide from God. God knows exactly where J is – physically, emotionally, spiritually. It’s hard to trust when we are so connected emotionally to our kids, but God loves them even more than we do. He will work circumstances so that J will eventually have to quit running and fully face his life and his choices. At that point, it’s up to J what he does with what he sees. We are all praying for him, and for your family.


  5. I’m sorry. This is very familiar to me, and probably will be very familiar to you through the years. Unfortunately, this is the way it goes for 87% of addicts.

    It’s really harsh, but I have to say, get used to it now. It probably won’t get better.

  6. Well, he knows what he’s doing and what the consequences will be. I hope you can just focus on the rest of your family this weekend. Of course you’re worried. What is your greatest fear of what may happen? Sometimes thinking through the worst helps me, but I may be weird that way.

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